When I make food for a party, I usually opt for a dessert or a dip—something that’s quick for me and easy for my friends to eat.
I’ve prepared my fair share of homemade queso and cake-mix cookies, so when I found this recipe for bacon cheeseburger garbage bread, I was excited about trying something different. Chances are high that no one else at any party I’m attending is going to make this. I’m not confident it will slice up nicely like the recipe pictures show, but you can use a knife and spatula to cut it and kind of scoop it out onto a plate and serve it with a fork.
There’s a decent amount of prep work involved with this recipe, so I did not make my own pizza dough. (Plus, I already have proved to you that I can.) Instead, I used two cans of Giant Eagle brand roll-out dough. I smushed the two pieces together and then got out a ruler and measured to see how close my dough was to the recipe’s recommendations. I ended up at 20 inches by 12 inches, and that was good enough for me.
OK, with that said, the amounts listed for this recipe are outrageous. You do not need an entire medium onion—you do not even need half of a medium onion. And I used maybe 1/4 of the massive jar of sliced pickles the recipe told me to buy. There just isn’t enough surface area to cover to warrant that much stuff. I also had leftover beef and cheese mixture and cheese slices, and my roll was as full as I could get it.
Please take a good look at the photo of my unrolled cheeseburger bread and be impressed that I was able to turn it into what it is supposed to be. I started out trying to roll it how you would a cinnamon roll, but the dough was pulling apart, and I was afraid it was going to rip. I had the most success sliding my fingers under the dough and then doing a lift-and-drop move. The ends were surprisingly easy to tuck under, and I transferred the log to my baking dish without anything falling out. If you have a large baking sheet, I would recommend preparing and rolling the bread right on it and skipping the step of moving it.
It really does smell like a cheeseburger when it bakes, and the cheese nicely oozes out of the sides.
One last note: American cheese freaks me out. I know the label says it’s cheese, but I’m not convinced it actually is. It reminds me of plastic. The only reason I went ahead and used it for this recipe was because I was worried that if I substituted another kind of cheese it wouldn’t melt as well. I have found it congeals on contact, so I went ahead and ripped pieces as I unpackaged it instead of trying to chop it. If you find another kind of cheese that works with this, let me know.
2 pounds ground beef chuck
12 ounces American cheese slices (about 30 slices)
All-purpose flour for dusting
1 1/2 pounds store-bought pizza dough, at room temperature
5 tablespoons ketchup
2 tablespoons yellow mustard
1 medium red onion, finely chopped
12 strips cooked bacon, broken in half
One 32-ounce jar of dill pickle chips (35 to 40 chips)
Sesame seeds for garnish
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1 teaspoon dried onion flakes
1 teaspoon sugar
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
1. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
2. Heat a large skillet over medium heat. Add the beef and cook, stirring to break it up into small crumbles, until cooked through.
3. Roughly chop half of the cheese, leaving other half as slices. Set aside.
4. Remove the beef from the skillet and transfer to a large bowl. Let cool completely, then stir in chopped cheese.
5. On a lightly floured work surface, roll the dough into a 20-by-14-inch rectangle.
6. Arrange the beef and cheese mixture evenly on one half of the dough, starting on the shorter end and leaving a 1-inch border on the sides.
7. Drizzle 2 tablespoons ketchup evenly over the beef mixture and the uncovered half of the dough; repeat with all the mustard, and then the red onion.
8. Lay down the remaining cheese slices evenly over the half of the dough with no beef mixture, leaving a 1-inch border on the sides.
9. Arrange the bacon pieces and 24 dill pickle chips just over the beef mixture.
10. Working from the short side with the beef mixture, tightly roll up the dough into a log, jelly-roll style. Pinch the open ends together to seal, then tuck them underneath the log. Transfer the log, seam side-down, to the prepared baking sheet, brush all over with water and sprinkle with sesame seeds.
11. Bake, rotating the pan halfway through, until the bread is golden brown, about 40 minutes.
For the sauce:
Whisk together the mayonnaise, onion flakes, sugar, a pinch of salt and pepper and the remaining 3 tablespoons ketchup, 2 tablespoons finely chopped dill pickle chips and 1 teaspoon pickle brine in a small bowl.